There are a dozen textbook ways to deal with stress, but everyone ultimately has their own unique ways of blowing off steam. Here’s what the Internet does to relax, according to Reddit!
Using their imagination
“I like to Google restaurants and bars in other countries to look at their menus and see what I would get if I were there. It relaxes me and also helps me kill boredom sometimes.” – -eDgAR-
Make themselves laugh, literally.
“Stand up comedy. Laughter helps the most [in my opinion] and even when you’re super stressed or pissed off, a comedian can catch you off guard and bring you back down to earth with a fit of the giggles.”
That sickening dread that fills your tummy upon finding out that the subject of your affection ain’t interested at being more than friends, or when they start dating someone else – there’s little more torturous than the crush of unrequited feelings (that’s why they call it a “crush” right?). Don’t worry, we’ve all been there. Which is why we’ve created this mini guide for when you know it’s time to cut your feelings loose.
#1 Commit to the process of letting go
Honestly, this crush ain’t going nowhere unless you’re fully committed to getting over it. It will take time (perhaps lots of it) but it will eventually fade as long as you’re willing to do the work and let go of your feelings. Understand that there’s nothing romantic that’ll come out of your efforts and accept the situation for what it is. And it’s not personal; you can’t compel someone else to have feelings for you any more than you can force yourself to have romantic feelings for a person you don’t like. Calm down, and let loose.
#2 Let your feelings out
Whether it’s talking to trusted friends or close family members about your feelings, creating a good support system where you’re able to vent your feelings will help tremendously. Speaking out loud about your feelings, why you’re so into this person, how hurt you are, etc. is a cathartic process that can also help you gain clarity of the situation.
#3 Be sad for awhile
Grab some ice cream, put on a playlist full of breakup songs, or watch a tearjerking movie – set aside time to just… wallow in sadness. But after that session is up, pick yourself back up and continue the process of getting over that crush.
#4 Unfollow Their Social Media
If you’re crushing on a class/schoolmate, chances are you’d see them everyday. But why make it harder for yourself by staying connected even on social media? With all the stalking you’ve been doing on their Instagram/Snapchat/Facebook/Twitter/Tumblr accounts, your feed is probably full of their updates – posts that you shouldn’t be looking at. Allowing yourself that option of being able to constantly check on them isn’t healthy and will only further your misery. Unfollow, unlike, unsubscribe, out of sight and out of mind.
#5 Create distance
With that being said, it’s best to give yourself space from your crush and minimise any interaction. It might be difficult (and awkward) especially if they’re in the same school/class or even share mutual friends. But perhaps it’s also a good opportunity to branch out socially and make new friends.
#6 Keep yourself busy
Keeping busy will naturally steer your mind away from your crush, so as much as possible, try occupying yourself with things you enjoy. Whether it’s redecorating your room, or going rock climbing, or spending more time with your friends, distracting yourself with different activities will keep you from obsessing over what could’ve been.
#7 Focus on yourself
It definitely sucks to be the one having unreciprocated feelings, but know that it doesn’t take away from your awesomeness. You were incredibly courageous by allowing yourself to be vulnerable by having feelings for someone else; just because it didn’t work out the way you wanted it to, doesn’t mean you’re not good enough. It’s their loss! From now on, constantly do things that empower and remind yourself of how great you are. Whether it’s indulging in your favourite hobbies, or stepping out of your comfort zones by trying out new activities, start focusing on yourself instead of on someone else. Your future self will thank you!
Featured image: Anthony Intraversato on Unsplash
What are some of your go-to activities when you’re feeling down? Share ’em in the comments section!
What started from peddling nail polishes door-to-door has flourished into a booming beauty venture. Daryl Chew, the brainchild behind Nail Deck, spills it all.
In 2011, a university student took the plunge into entrepreneurship amidst all odds – selling nail polishes door-to-door and running pushcarts on campuses, before evolving into a hardware startup which was forced to cease productions due to lack of funds. Today, 29-year-old Daryl Chew is the owner of his very own custom cosmetics empire known as Nail Deck, where they specialise in creating bespoke nail lacquers. Innovating the beauty industry in ways previously unimaginable, Daryl is painting his own rules for success.
It all started when my then-girlfriend (now wife) wanted to buy a specific brand of colour-changing nail polish from the United States, but it doesn’t ship to Singapore. Back then I was under an entrepreneurship programme in the National University of Singapore, so I thought it was an interesting product from a male’s point of view. I contacted the company and became the brand’s official distributor – I ordered a few thousand bottles but didn’t know what to do with the leftovers, so I peddled a backpack filled with nail polishes and sold them to salons. After graduation, I opened pushcarts to reach consumers directly and it took off from there.
If you could describe yourself as a nail polish shade, what kind of colour would you envision it to be?
I would be a dark vampire blood red, and there’s a story behind it. When I was running pushcarts, I had people requesting for specific colours and there was a customer who asked for a “dark vampire blood red” but I couldn’t find the exact shade she wanted so she got frustrated. Over time, I received more and more requests. I don’t know who the woman is and I’ll never know the exact shade she envishioned, but that was what gave me the light bulb moment to go into nail polish customisation.
As a male in a largely female-oriented industry, what are your thoughts on the stigma surrounding men and beauty?
For me, I wear nail polish and all, but I’m not concerned with the comments. On the contrary, being a male in the field of cosmetics has allowed me to be more objective when it comes to business aspects. As I’m not a direct user, I go by consumer data instead of being emotionally invested in a product.
How does the entrepreneurial landscape differ from the past and now?
When I first started the business back in 2011, it was the beginning of the start-up craze and the industry has matured very quickly over the years. There are government organisations coming together to foster a strong ecosystem where they provide mentorship, fundraising initiatives, grants etc. You now have all these resources to leverage on – all you need is a good idea, determination and a leap of faith to make it happen.
What were the challenges you had to face and how did you overcome them?
Dealing with self-doubt. You see friends bringing in five-figure salaries, and you’d wonder whether you’ve made the right decision. But at the end of the day, nothing beats the satisfaction of being an entrepreneur. It’s a rollercoaster ride, but that’s what makes the ups better. I am also fortunate to have the support of my family and friends to keep me going.
Have you ever thought about what you’d be doing if you weren’t an entrepreneur?
The idea of working for another company has crossed my mind, but I love what I’m doing. I enjoy creating a brand that can carry on the legacy. 50 years down the road, I still hope to have my products on the shelves and continue bringing happiness to people.
What has been the most memorable moment for you thus far?
Not giving up on entrepreneurship and jumping back into the game. I put my business on hold for about two years. I enjoyed what I was doing, but I didn’t know how to grow the business and lost a lot of confidence, thus I wanted to gain more experience. I worked at an investment company and ended up doing well at it. I thought it was the right career path, but once you’ve had a taste of being your own boss, that sense of satisfaction will always be there.
How do you find the balance between work life and me-time?
I usually end my days earlier to spend time with my family. In the past, I had the belief that I should be working nonstop, but I realised that while businesses can always be built up again, relationships with your loved ones can’t be gained back easily. I also place a lot of emphasis on having a healthy lifestyle, so I would run on the weekends and train for marathons.
What’s a piece of advice you’d give to aspiring entrepreneurs?
Being an entrepreneur is not a career choice, but a lifestyle choice. You’ve got to be mentally prepared that a lot of things in your life are going to change, and you have to embrace the changes if you set your mind to becoming one.
At only 21 years old, Isabel Lee and her business partner Anna Ng are already making their mark in the F&B world. We speak to the young lady boss behind The Acai Affair to find out how she’s doing it all.
When you receive a calling, it’s best to answer it. And that’s exactly what Singapore Management University business undergraduate, Isabel Lee, did with her course mate Anna Ng when they both chose to pursue their passion for unassuming bowls of acai. Personal challenges and lack of experience didn’t deter the dynamic duo from launching their venture, with the store opening its welcoming doors in late 2016. The business is continually thriving one year on, proving that success isn’t necessarily defined age.
How did the idea behind An Acai Affair come about?
Anna and I are fans of acai bowls. We’re not the first in Singapore, but we felt that there was further potential for it. Taking into consideration that the selections available here are rather expensive, we wanted to come up with something more affordable and of good quality. Being business students ourselves, we made sure to do extensive market research on public opinions, competitors and the general market for healthy foods in Singapore. We decided to open our store in the East as there are plenty of gyms and wellness studios in the area, and people who patron these places usually look for healthy food after their workouts.
What made you want to pursue the brand with your current partner, instead of venturing on it solo?
It’s always easier to have someone to do it with. I think if we were to venture into business alone, it’d be much more daunting. Sharing the workload with a close friend makes it easier.
Did you face any financial challenges and how did you overcome them?
Initially, we didn’t have the funding. After pouring all our savings into the rent deposit, we had no money left so we turned to our parents for financial help. My parents refused at first, but we tried very hard to persuade them and eventually they decided to lend us some cash to cover our equipment and renovation costs. We are also lucky that we started making profits from the get-go, which makes it easier for us to repay our loan.
It’s really about managing priorities and making full use of all the time I can get – for example, spending less time going out and shopping. Not that those things are not significant, but doing it less allows me more time for other priorities. It’s getting better now ever since we hired more employees, but we definitely had to make sacrifices in the beginning.
What were the reactions of your family and friends upon hearing of your decision to set up a business?
They were quite against it as they were worried that I would flunk out of school. To my parents, doing well in my studies was a top priority. My mum knows how hard it is [to start a business], and she thought I was going into [this] without being fully aware of how difficult it would be. It took a lot of persuasion to show my parents that this was what I really wanted. After we overcame the first hurdle, they’ve been really supportive.
What’s the best thing about accomplishing your startup at such a young age?
I think it’s something that Anna and I can really be proud of. We tried to save as much as we could on setting up the store, so we did a lot of things ourselves. We have this black and white design wall that we drew ourselves, which took us 12 hours. Though it’s been a tiring journey, it’s been so fulfilling and it’s something really meaningful to us. Not a lot of people would have their own business at our age, although there’s increasingly more in recent years. It’s nice to hear when other people tell us that they didn’t think it would be possible for young entrepreneurs to succeed until they heard about us, or that they have been inspired by us to start their own ventures as well.
What’s one lesson you’ve learned as a student entrepreneur?
It changed my perspective on life as a student. I feel that in Singapore, everyone is so caught up with the paper chase. I used to be someone like that, and I would get bothered if I didn’t do well in school. For some people, their calling may not be in academics – it may be in art or singing, for example – and I think they would feel held back by the expectations of their parents and the norms of our society. I feel that I’ve managed to break out of that, and I wish more people would do the same and pursue what they’re passionate in.
What are your hopes for the business in the future?
Our second store at Marina DUO, Bugis is currently undergoing renovation so hopefully that will kick off. After that, we’re looking to expand the business to more outlets in Singapore and possibly overseas to countries like Indonesia and Malaysia, where more people can enjoy our acai bowls.
What advice would you share with fellow budding entrepreneurs?
The quote “In the end, we only regret the chances we didn’t take” by Lewis Carroll really rings true for me and the journey of An Acai Affair so far – which is why it’s up on a neon sign at our store! If you have a goal in mind and the means to attempt achieving it, you shouldn’t be afraid to try your best.
An Acai Affair is located at 101 East Coast Road, Singapore 428796. Get your daily dose of acai goodness on Facebook and Instagram via @anacaiaffair!
This article was adapted from the November 2017 issue of Teenage.
Rainy days are officially upon us and while the chilly change (the closest we’ll ever get to winter) may disrupt some outdoorsy plans, this sweater weather is perfect for snuggling up with a good book and a warm cuppa. Here are our top picks!
36 Questions That Changed My Mind About You By Vicki Grant
What it’s about: Rumor has it that you can make someone fall in love with you after asking 36 questions. Putting the hypothesis to the test, Paul and Hildy decide to take on the psychological study. From “What is your most terrible memory?” to “When did you last sing to yourself?”, the two strangers laugh, cry and share their darkest secrets through it all. But the most important question left unanswered: do Paul and Hildy fall in love in the end? Why it’s good for rainy days: Based off an actual psychological study from the 1990s, this book will keep your mind moving. What better than the wet weather to accompany your active brainwaves?
All The Ways the World Can End By Abby Sher
What it’s about: Eleanor is obsessed with analysing the plausible apocalypse: designer pathogens, blood moon prophecies, alien invasions… she has covered all the possibilities but failed to predict the destruction of her world. Her BFF is ditching her for a faraway school, her father is stricken with terminal cancer, and she starts harboring an unrequited crush for her dad’s doctor. All hope’s not lost however, as a potential love interest may soon come to her rescue. Why it’s good for rainy days: Dark looming clouds and flashes of lighting are synonymous with the end of the world – need we say more?
The Red Ribbon By Lucy Adlington
Image: Laura Patricia Rose
What it’s about: In Birchwood, Auschwitz, life is determined by your functionality – lucky for 14-year-old Ella, she found work as a dressmaker in a sewing workshop. Surrounded by luxurious silk, buttons and ribbons, Ella can almost forget that she is being held against her will and her survival determined by the quality of the dresses she makes. Will Ella earn her keep and live to tell her horrible tale or is she another lost body added to the pile? Why it’s good for rainy days: The plot is goosebumps-ridden experience with some of the most iconic scenes set in cold or wet weather; the brooding storm will only intensify your imagination.
Seven Days of You By Cecilia Vinesse
What it’s about: The last time you could call Sophia and Jamie ‘friends’ was right before he left for the States – the last three years of living in separate countries had helped the memory of their painful breakup fade. But now it’s Sophia’s turn to leave and she’s determined to make the best of her last seven days in Tokyo, taking in the sounds and sights with her BFF, her forever crush and his new girlfriend. It was supposed to be a perfect farewell until Jamie’s sudden return… Why it’s good for rainy days: If the cover hasn’t already convinced you that rain and romance goes hand in hand, the weather will help bring to life the cliché downpours that the characters will fight, cry and kiss in.
Mirror, Mirror By Cara Delevinge
What it’s about: Red, Rose, Leo and Naomi were brought together by music but held together by their inner demons – drawing strength from one another as they fight through their individual battles. Their support system seemed air tight until the optimist of the crew is found belly up in Thames River. Did they fail to see the warning signs of a suicide attempt or is there more than meets the eye? The band of misfits are on a mission to solve the mystery even without the police. Why it’s good for rainy days: If you don’t already believe in the chemistry between a profound mystery novel and dark clouds, Mirror, Mirror has a plot that will spur on a series of melancholic thoughts that complement the weather.
The Language of Thorns By Leigh Bardugo
What it’s about: A genre that positions itself in between the gory Grimm’s Fairytales and their child-friendly renditions, featuring six short stories weaved with dangerous magic and enchantment. Every tale breathes you into a world of lurking evil with helpful river spirits, hungry woods, a man-eating prince, gingerbread girls and mermaids that can sing a garden to life – all of which promises unexpected twists and delicious betrayals. Not to mention the lavish illustrations that morph with the stories. Why it’s good for rainy days: Fairytales, myths and legends for grown ups – every short story overflows with mystic and the pitter-patter of the rain only enhances its whimsical charm.
Genuine Fraud By E. Lockhart
What it’s about: Jule Williams wears many hats; and wigs, accents, background stories. In fact, aside from her diabolical smarts and that she’s run to ground, we can’t be too sure who ‘Jule’ really is. Her new persona is well camouflaged until she meets Imogen, a millionaire heiress with a secret that soon becomes her closest friend. The murkiness of each character will only be made certain later in the story, but you can count on an intense friendship, a disappearance, couple of murders and bad romance. Why it’s good for rainy days: The shadow of mystery cast in every page is just like a heavy rain cloud about to blow – you’ll have your head stuck in this story with a fierce anticipation (and hesitation) for the end.
The Complete Short Stories of Earnest Hemmingway
What it’s about: Of the 60 fiction stories, you can expect exciting tales inspired by World War II and spiels of conversations between unassuming people. On top of classics like “Hills Like White Elephants” and “A Clean, Well-Lighted Place”, you can expect 21 unpublished stories written in a characteristically Hemingway flair – complex plots with uncluttered sentences that breathes life into every character. Why it’s good for rainy days: Whether the rain lasts for 15 minutes or 2 hours, this book has you covered with 60 different endings to conquer. More importantly, every story is filled with literary allusion that hints at something deeper for you to ponder over even after you’re done.
We’re always on the hunt for good reads, so share with us your favourite books!